The Funtasian

There is a reason why I continuously come back every week to listen to these guys. One, because I was a podcast virgin & they broke my PC cherry so therefore I am emotionally attached and two, they have grown & evolved for the better over their 15 episodes. It's worth my time & then I get to bring them to all of you. My people.

Here is the link...

http://mickandtommyshow.wordpress.com/?p=41&preview=true

The Mick and Tommy Show Thanksgiving Special with Mick Thomas, Tommy Dunseith & Jimmy Britt. Mark Lund also makes an appearance to talk about his pooing habits

Mick gives us a history lesson about Thanksgiving with definitions. He's really looking at porn. Seriously don't become a history teacher zzzzz. Libria is NOT a country Mick. Mark Lund joins in and apparently is a serial hit & run farter. He really likes his shits too. I can appreciate a good dump.

Mick is hoping he gets sooo big he can hire himself a Fart Guard to take the blame for his unwielding ass stinkers. 

So, what are they doing for Thanksgiving? Tommy & his family are volunteering at the Brain Trauma ward at LIJ. Ensuing Laughter. Sorry man, even that made me laugh. He wants to give thanks by feeding mac and cheese at the wack-a-do ward. Mick calls BULLSHIT. They dont need Tommy. Where's the staff? Tommy explains he will be serving the food and not teasing them with it as they are NOT billy goats. Jimmy tries to be the voice of reason between the two. Tommy must be getting some ass for this. Catholic guilt is making Tommy the villain, but tries to think of other people even when the acid didnt come through. Ahh the truth comes out...He is doing this for a bit.

Mick tells us about his volunteering in Baltimore. The family fed the real homeless while Mick cleaned the kitchen of a potpourri factory ruined by homeless stank. But in all seriousness, Mick is a charitable guy who doesnt like to boast about his charitable contributions. I am Mick Thomas. Buy my new comedy album. www.mickthomascomedy.com. A percentage of the proceeds from the sales will go to St. Judes Childrens Hospital. It is a fabulously funny album that you wont regret buying. Plus it helps St. Judes. Win win. 

Jimmy will eat, give thanks, and not give a shit about the Indians from 400 years ago. Sounds like a plan. 

Micks all by his lonesome on Thanksgiving but dont feel bad for him. He was jacking up the heat, turning the volume up on the porn and having a protitute party with his comedy money. I'm thinking we are all doing Thanksgiving wrong except Mick. 

Micks take on T-day is that our American holiday is just celebrating that we are a bunch of fat fucks. Can you say gluttony?  It's a deadly sin but I have to admit. He's kinda spot on.

Tommy impersonates Mick & I have this sudden urge to eat a bowl of me Lucky Charms.

At one point in his life Tommy bought an African kid off the TV with monthy payments. He bought a GIRL. Because he is Not a queer. Tommys a great artist & sent his African kid a portrait. Uhhh where is she gonna hang it? The money goes to the village but should've went to sending her frogs. They have flies on their faces. A burger or a kit kat would've worked too. Unfortunately Tommy couldn't afford his Arican kid and had to sell it back so they broke up. SMH

There is no Thanksgiving in Ireland. The Irish celebrate holidays by punching their wives. They only do Christmas and Easter. Holidays based on ghosts. 

Tommy tells a crude pilgrim joke...that may or may not have been on the internet a few times. It's ok Tommy I still think you are brilliant. 

When Mick is left to spend the holiday alone he's got a honey do list. He wanted to hire mexicans to paint but couldnt wank. They wont tell anyone. Micks a fuckin genius because he thought of hiring two hookers in heels off Craigslist to paint so he could wank at the same time. Best Thanksgiving EVER. 

Find out what happened when Mick drop kicked a giant styrofoam turkey, kicked a dog back to the Mayflower and told everyone to go fuck themselves. Ok make that two Thanksgivings. Hide yo dogs, hide yo lawn decorations. 

Here comes the shit talk again. Mark comes back after trying to sit up 90 degrees while taking a shit. The approach didn't work. Give it time. Mick takes nice healthy shits, 3 times a day. WHAT THE FUCK?? Talk about a shit show ;)

Tommy is thankful for a magical universe which will infect people with kindness even though there are Irish cunts in the world. Ahem Mick... Timmy is thankful for the ride

I am thankful for these guys who bring their comedic skills to the internet airwaves. 

Follow Mick & Tommy on Twitter: @mickthomas, @tommymarbles. Jimmy has not caught up with the rest of the social networking world as of yet, but he will come to the dark side.

Become a fan on facebook. https://www.facebook.com/pages/Mick-Tommy-Show/205755642889738?fref=ts These guys seriously need more fan page likes. Come on, you can do it for me...

Subscribe to them on itunes for free so you can get it in Germany...dah

 http://feeds.feedburner.com/MickAndTommyShow

Catch their podcasts on the Wordpress blog site if you have something against itunes like myself:

mickandtommyshow.wordpress.com

And duh like my page too www.facebook.com/thefuntasian

The Mick & Tommy Show Episode 15 is brought to you by Nardy Honda Smithtown www.nardyhonda.com, Mcguires Comedy Club Bohemia www.mcguirescomedyshows.com & Governers Comedy Club Levittown www.govs.com. Three awesome places. Go to them. 

Thanks for stopping by! See you on the Flip Side ;)

Are you thankful everyday or do you only give thanks right before Thanksgiving? I, myself give thanks everyday and it usually goes like this... Thank god I am NOT pregnant. 

The last few days I was thankful for my curves & my vagina but there is so much more I am thankful for. Here is my list...

My sex toy because duh, everybody should have one or five. Everybody.

My kids so I can subcontract chores. They gotta be good for something.

My stiletto heels that make my short legs look hot when my feet are firmly planted on the ground and even hotter when they are up in the air. Wink.

Sex. Like who is not thankful for that? When you are married as long as I am it is hard to come by. Game over. So when you can get it, you better damn well be thankful for it. 

My boobs. Im almost 41 and they still stand up on their own & they're mine. nuff said

Being half asian. I didn't get these cheek bones from the round eye side. 

My mom & dad who without a doubt are there for me 24/7 and also have given me so much material to blog about that I will never run out of words. This includes my brother Ben too. I love you. (weak moment)

My dogs for shitting in the foyer and making me get up earlier than I have to.

The hall monitor who in tenth grade said to me, "You are going to have an hourglass figure with that little waist & the boys are going to love it"  I laughed at her, but man she was a smart cookie

Tampax Ultra formally the Vortex. They finally make a tampon that can handle the civil unrest in my uterus only to discontinue it everywhere and finding it is like seeing a fuckin unicorn in the middle of Walmart. 

Rainbow cookies. Just because they are pretty and they are my favorite cookie ever. 

For every person in my life that has ever made me laugh. I find humor in all that I come across and it really gets me thru anything. Except childbirth, there was nothing funny about an 8lb parasite coming out of my vagina. ;)

My husband because I am crazy and well, YOU married me. 

Jello shots, Pop Shots & Reddi Whip. Yum

Coochie Cream ;) For those of you who have no idea what it is. It makes the hair on your body grow back slower after you shave. AMAZABALLS

My Fama-ly because having 9000 asian relatives just isnt enough. Worse than rabbits

The Kraken for making my mornings as frustrating as they are hilarious.

Madzilla because we laugh til we cry 

Most importantly I would like to thank YOU; my supporters, my fans & my friends. Thank you for coming back everyday and supporting my blog & my sick, twisted, sarcastic humor. You make it fun and you make me laugh which for me is the most gratifying aspect about being the Funtasian. Besides my cartoon self being so hot. 

My friends old and new. You know who you are. You hold me up & pick me up, you let me sleep anywhere I want (like you have a choice), you train me, you push me, you drive me nuts, you share your panties, you crack me up, you let me poison you, you got me to vote, you look for Ben & Jerrys Cream Filled Whore & you feed me to name a few, but most importantly...You let me be ME. A complete & utter looney bin. I love you from the bottom of my icy cold heart. 

So give thanks to your bits, your toys, your friends, your food, your loved ones & my blog. You're welcome. ;) 

Happy Thanksgiving Tasians! See you on the Flip Side...MWAHHHHHH